Yup, we don't know if Nephi had warts, or whether he had a prominent semitic nose, or stumbled over his words when speaking (like Moses did).
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If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animated contest of freedom, go from us in peace. May your chains sit lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen! - Samuel Adams
"Seriously baby, God told me to do it. Now how about you sneak away with me, and I'll take you places you never dreamed of going!"
Sounds more like the guy who abducted Elizabeth Smart to me. I would require divine intervention like Joseph got in order to consider him a potential pick.
LM
-- Edited by LoudmouthMormon at 08:02, 2008-11-26
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And I'd discuss the holy books with the learned men, seven hours every day. That would be the sweetest thing of all.
I was actually at a testimony mtg. (in Idaho) once and this lady was saying how she wanted to be sealed to Joseph Smith in the next life... he was perfect. She'd never been married or was only briefly married in her early years... I tell ya, she was WHACKED.
It's very easy for single women to get fantasies about certain people and hold out for some person they think is "out there" and they just aren't out there. What if Nephi had BO for crying out loud? Everyone practically worshiping him - wanting him to be king and everything... enough already! He needs to spend an evening at home with his wife if you sheeple don't freaking mind!
Yeah, it's easy to put someone on a pedestal when you don't know them well. The challenge is putting and keeping our spouses on that pedestal even when we know them *that* well.
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Life is tough but it's tougher if you're stupid. -John Wayne
Beefche, I think that it is undeniable that your preferences have kept you single. I mean, if you had absolutely no standards, you could have been married several time already! The only question is whether your standards are too strict or not. That I really can't know. I know single people, and I have seen them make choices on whether or not to settle, and in each case it has been complicated. Of course, it is undeniable that there are singles out there who are waiting for Ken or Barbie with a testimony and a large bank account.
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If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animated contest of freedom, go from us in peace. May your chains sit lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen! - Samuel Adams
Yep, you're right, arbi. If all I wanted was marriage, I would be rivaling Elizabeth Taylor by now. And I would actually use the words, "My baby's daddy......."
But, as a warning, be careful in expressing to singles that the reason they are unmarried is because they are picky. That can be very hurtful. If you truly think that's the problem, then be sure that you are a close friend to the single person and provide advice in a loving manner. Otherwise, expect to have blood fly.
I've been told that by my best friends and yet I simply can't see how that is true. My "requirements" when I was 21 were stupid, but they have lessened as I've gotten wiser. Now, I can't seem to get beyond finding a single, active, temple-worthy Mormon man. I'm not willing to settle on any of those adjectives.....
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It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.
I think that only a close friend would be able to tell if pickiness is truly the problem, much less be able to say something to the person in question without blood flying. It's a tricky thing. I have people close to me who are single (both male and female), and I can't honestly say that they've been too picky. Of course you need a certain amount of pickiness. I think that your criteria of a temple worthy mate is a good one, and not one that should be compromised on, for instance. But as you point out, there are criteria that you have lost over time. I think, though, that the poem posted at the beginning makes a good point about people in general. Would Nephi have been able to get a date in our image conscious culture? He might have been really handsome or really ugly for all we know.
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If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animated contest of freedom, go from us in peace. May your chains sit lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen! - Samuel Adams
Single, active and temple-worthy? That's IT? And you're telling me you can't find someone like that... Um, yeah. I'm calling BS on that one.
Maybe YOU are just not ready. For whatever reason. I think that's the issue.
It's like that saying, When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.
You've been on a mission, you're quite smart and you know that God is bound when we do what He says. Marrying in the temple is a righteous desire... He is bound to bring that to pass for you if you pray for it with faith and then don't botch up His ways.
-- Edited by Cocobeem at 09:43, 2008-12-08
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Life is tough but it's tougher if you're stupid. -John Wayne
Yeah, lundie, there has to be some attraction. But, I'm willing to get to know someone first and allow nature to help that attraction, rather than dismiss him off the bat for not being "attractive."
Come on, coco. So the reason I'm single is either 1) I'm not ready (whatever that means--realistically, who is EVER ready for marriage??), 2) I don't have enough faith or I'm not praying with faith or 3) I'm botching up God's plans.
Yep, you got me. I've never prayed about it, especially not with any real faith, and I purposely sabotage any attempts or efforts of any single guy.
Forget what the prophets have said on the subject:
"I also recognize that not all women in the Church will have an opportunity for marriage and motherhood in mortality. But if those of you in this situation are worthy and endure faithfully, you can be assured of all blessings from a kind and loving Heavenly Fatherand I emphasize all blessings.
I assure you that if you have to wait even until the next life to be blessed with a choice companion, God will surely compensate you. Time is numbered only to man. God has your eternal perspective in mind."
Of course there are things I've done wrong or am not doing right. But to tell someone who is single that "it's all your fault" is wrong, not helpful, and actually, unkind. So, just be careful....some people may not be as forgiving as I am.
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It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.
I know people who have been single a long time, and I know that they're not too picky. I frequently think that the people they date are too picky.
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If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animated contest of freedom, go from us in peace. May your chains sit lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen! - Samuel Adams
Jen, I doubt that Coco meant anything bad at all -- Just a statement that she thinks Beefche is marriageable.
The dating situation out there puzzles me greatly. There are some splendidly nice people who can't seem to find another nice LDS person. Why is this so difficult?
My acquaintance who wrote that did so after yet another bad experience. He contacted someone on an LDS site and she suggested that they meet in person. He took her to dinner. She did not say one positive thing the whole evening, but criticized his food choices and his opinions and everything. One of her questions: Do you have any friends who aren't imaginary? Another statement: So, you like to make things? That means your house is full of junk.
Obviously, she wants him to leave her alone, but she saw his picture on the site (he's bald) and still suggested meeting. Why not say a simple, polite, "I don't think we would fit" or some such. Why dish out an evening of insults?
Perhaps the nice LDS unmarrieds are home licking their wounds after a series of bad experiences.
That lady sounds harsh. And that's such totally unchristlike behavior. I think,in that lady's case, it's abundantly clear why she isn't married.
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If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animated contest of freedom, go from us in peace. May your chains sit lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen! - Samuel Adams
Thanks, historian... I'm basically saying there's no "reason" that sticks out why beef shouldn't be married. She's cute, she's funny, witty, doesn't smell... etc...
But if beef thinks she's "above" the possibility of botching up God's plans... I'm a little worried about that attitude. All of us are capable of that. You're talking to someone who's divorced, remember.
I think once people pass a certain age, it becomes more difficult to get married because the pressure increases and (can I say this without offending? probably not, so oh well...) they get more stuck in their ways and even if they consider themselves not ultra picky, I think it's harder for older people to "become one" than younger, stupid (oh, I meant naive and ignorant) people.
Anyway, not much good coming from this conversation, so... Never Mind.
There's plenty of ugly, physically repulsive, rude, smelly, chauvinistic, whiny people that get married all the time... how do you explain that?
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Life is tough but it's tougher if you're stupid. -John Wayne
Thanks, historian... I'm basically saying there's no "reason" that sticks out why beef shouldn't be married. She's cute, she's funny, witty, doesn't smell... etc...
But if beef thinks she's "above" the possibility of botching up God's plans... I'm a little worried about that attitude. All of us are capable of that. You're talking to someone who's divorced, remember.
I think once people pass a certain age, it becomes more difficult to get married because the pressure increases and (can I say this without offending? probably not, so oh well...) they get more stuck in their ways and even if they consider themselves not ultra picky, I think it's harder for older people to "become one" than younger, stupid (oh, I meant naive and ignorant) people.
Anyway, not much good coming from this conversation, so... Never Mind.
There's plenty of ugly, physically repulsive, rude, smelly, chauvinistic, whiny people that get married all the time... how do you explain that?
Do you think that God punishes us for "botching" up His plans? Do you think that we only get one chance to make the right choice and if we don't, then oh well?
I'm really curious on that concept. I've never thought that when we make a bad or wrong choice that God then punishes us by withholding a blessing. The consequences of our actions may feel like punishment. He may withhold a blessing because we aren't ready, worthy, or haven't asked for it. But I cannot imagine that He gives us only one shot at making the right choice or allows us to botch up His plans with our mortal stupidity. Perhaps that's my romantic nature asserting itself, but I feel that all experiences (good and bad--even a horrible event) can be a blessing to us.
And I cannot explain why ugly, repulsive, rude, smelly, chauvinistic, whiny people get married. Believe me, I've seen and known people who have married and whined, "What is it about me??" or "Why can't I??" If my only goal were marriage, then I would have been married for several years. But my goal is higher than that. I've met several men who are honorable priesthood holders with whom I believe I could have had a happy marriage. However, either the man didn't feel the same way about me or he was already taken (in which case, I don't dwell on the issue).
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It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.
Do you think that God punishes us for "botching" up His plans?
That is a very interesting question. Do you think He rewards us for it? I don't. Do you think it's even possible for us to botch up His plans? Do you think it's possible for us to botch up our own lives?
Do you think that we only get one chance to make the right choice and if we don't, then oh well?
Do you think there is only one right choice? I don't. I think we are sometimes thrown into circumstances because of the choices of others. Perhaps a certain "right choice" is thereby forever eliminated, but other "right choices" may spring up instead.
I'm really curious on that concept. I've never thought that when we make a bad or wrong choice that God then punishes us by withholding a blessing.
I've always thought that blessings were predicated on our righteousness. When we are faithful, God is bound. When we are not faithful, we have no promise.
The consequences of our actions may feel like punishment. He may withhold a blessing because we aren't ready, worthy, or haven't asked for it. But I cannot imagine that He gives us only one shot at making the right choice or allows us to botch up His plans with our mortal stupidity.
I, on the other hand, disagree and I call it moral agency. Our mortal stupidity is our problem. If we don't want to overcome it, it will continue to be our problem. This almost reminds me of the public school system where we don't want to fail anyone because their self-esteem might suffer. Who cares if they're stupid? Everyone should be equally rewarded.... I don't believe that.
Just this last GenConf Pres. Monson made one comment that stood out to me like it had been delivered by a bolt of lightning. I had been a little distracted, but when he said this, everything stopped for a moment. He said, "Opportunities come, and then they are gone." I believe that. I believe we take advantage of some and miss some every single day of our lives. And I don't believe we can "go back" - we miss what we miss, whether it's our stupidity or our pride or our laziness or our blindness or whatever.
Perhaps that's my romantic nature asserting itself, but I feel that all experiences (good and bad--even a horrible event) can be a blessing to us.
I totally agree with this. Our diligence and level of commitment is fluid... new opportunities arise all the time. Sometimes we're ready, sometimes not.
And I cannot explain why ugly, repulsive, rude, smelly, chauvinistic, whiny people get married. Believe me, I've seen and known people who have married and whined, "What is it about me??" or "Why can't I??" If my only goal were marriage, then I would have been married for several years. But my goal is higher than that. I've met several men who are honorable priesthood holders with whom I believe I could have had a happy marriage. However, either the man didn't feel the same way about me or he was already taken (in which case, I don't dwell on the issue).
Maybe there's some nice man out there wondering the same thing... too bad beefche didn't feel the same way about me...
I don't know. I mean, even Elder Oaks and Sheri Dew didn't hook up.
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Life is tough but it's tougher if you're stupid. -John Wayne
