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Post Info TOPIC: Purina Diet (some food storage levity)

Senior Bucketkeeper

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Posts: 1760
Purina Diet (some food storage levity)

I am having a boring life

Yesterday I was at
Wal-Mart  buying a large
bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet Sheriff the Wonder Dog and was
in the checkout line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have
little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was
starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't
because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50
pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out
of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that
it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one
or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally compl ete so
it works well and I was going to try it again (I have to mention here
that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story).

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in the intensive care because the
poisoned me. I told her no; I stepped off a curb to sniff a Golden
Retriever's butt and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard.

Wal-Mart won't let me shop there anymore.


Why Food Storage:

Future Queen in Zion

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Posts: 3155



"The promptings of the Holy Ghost will always be sufficient for our needs if we keep to the covenant path. Our path is uphill most days, but the help we receive for the climb is literally divine." --Elaine S. Dalton

Keeper of the Holy Grail

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Posts: 5519

Ha! I heard a different version ... but yours is good. pray.gif


Life is tough but it's tougher if you're stupid.  -John Wayne


Senior Bucketkeeper

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Posts: 1599

That's a good one, mirk. giggle.gif

"There is order in the way the Lord reveals His will to mankind. . .we cannot receive revelation for someone else's stewardship." L. Tom Perry
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