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Post Info TOPIC: The Salon (formerly THE SALOON)
hiccups


Future Queen in Zion

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The Salon (formerly THE SALOON)
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Look what I found! The infamous Bountiful Saloon. biggrin


I'd better sceedattle. It ain't ladies night yet.

-- Edited by hiccups at 11:42, 2007-09-07

-- Edited by hiccups at 23:05, 2007-09-14

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"The promptings of the Holy Ghost will always be sufficient for our needs if we keep to the covenant path. Our path is uphill most days, but the help we receive for the climb is literally divine." --Elaine S. Dalton
salesortonscom


Wise and Revered Master

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THE SALOON
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Turn on the player piano boys! Let's fire off them hog irons! YeeeeeHawwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm manning the stripper clip poker table. Buy in is one stripper clip of ammo.

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God Made Man, Sam Colt Made Him Equal.

Jason
PollyAnna


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salesortonscom wrote:
stripper clip poker table

eyepopping.gif



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rayb


Hot Air Balloon

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Ray takes a match to this place... FOOSH!

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Poncho29


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...as all the cowboys come running out in their long johns.

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salesortonscom


Wise and Revered Master

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It's stripper clip poker not strip poker. Argh!!!!! Where's Mirk when I need him.

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Jason
Poncho29


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I knew you didn't mean strip poker Jas, I just thought it would be fun to play along! biggrin.gif

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salesortonscom


Wise and Revered Master

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The stripper clips are necessary for firing off the hog irons at Josh Groben when he shows up early for ladies night. I wonder if he'll bring Leo Dicrapio with him. That'd be a two for one!

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God Made Man, Sam Colt Made Him Equal.

Jason
rayb


Hot Air Balloon

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Ray enters the Saloon, near the stage and starts singing, "In the Hollow of thy Hand, as he grows from boy to man, let his understanding deepen and increase..."

--Ray

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(Don't take it personally, everyone finds me offensive. Yet somehow I manage to live with myself.)
Euphrasie


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*throws loose change onto the stage from the balcony where she's hiding*

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Poncho29


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Then all the poker players start shootin...

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Euphrasie


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giggle.gif

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Cocobeem


Keeper of the Holy Grail

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Awesome! I haven't played strip poker since the high school drama trip to Cedar City -err...sprint.gif

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Euphrasie


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Really Coco? I find that...surprising.

nana.gif

-- Edited by Euphrasie at 13:12, 2007-09-07

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Cocobeem


Keeper of the Holy Grail

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Well, you know, not much chance on the mission... and after that, well...

(Pours a sasparilla down Euph's back.)

nana.gif

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Cat Herder


Understander of unimportant things

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The confusion about a stripper clip is as awkwardly humorous as the comment by Poncho's step-mother when Poncho's little brother and later to be bride treated us to a BNL concert... "Is that really appropriate to go see a group with that sort of name?"  clueless.gif  devilish.gif  wink.gif


That thar Raybies fellar... he's tryin' to turn this hootenanny into some sort of gentrified New York City tea room!  And Euphie is tryin' to turn this into some sort of house of ill repute by paying him money to do so!


Please don't shoot, feed, or pay the pie-annar player!


YEEEEEHAAAW!!!  cowboy.gif



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PollyAnna


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FOOD FIGHT!!! 

boo.gif


-- Edited by PollyAnna at 13:28, 2007-09-07

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salesortonscom


Wise and Revered Master

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This reminds me of Blazing Saddles!! You guys are the best!

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beefche


Profuse Pontificator

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Blazing Saddles!  Cocobeem, did you bring those beans? 

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rayb


Hot Air Balloon

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Thar tryin to make uh munkie outta yew!!

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Roper


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*Roper joins Ray on the stage*

Is that SATB arrangement?  Cause if we can get a few of the lasses to join in, we could do a quartet.

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The ability to qualify for, receive, and act on personal revelation is the single most important skill that can be acquired in this life. - Julie Beck
Cocobeem


Keeper of the Holy Grail

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You know my saddle's blazing, girl! wink.gif

I kinda' dig an a cappella men's group. smile.gif

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hiccups


Future Queen in Zion

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:starts flinging leftover guacamole dip at Coco: Simmer down, you!

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"The promptings of the Holy Ghost will always be sufficient for our needs if we keep to the covenant path. Our path is uphill most days, but the help we receive for the climb is literally divine." --Elaine S. Dalton
Cocobeem


Keeper of the Holy Grail

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*begins shuffling over at the far table*

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Poncho29


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*looks around and asks*

Ain't there no sheriff or no debudies in these here parts, or wuz they all run outta town?

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arbilad


Head Chef

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I think that Coco's the sheriff today. Who knows who it will be tomorrow.

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rayb


Hot Air Balloon

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"Dear lord who blesses us with love... please send this day thy spirit from above..."

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Cocobeem


Keeper of the Holy Grail

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police.gif  Excuse me, sir?  Yes, you in the pink cowboy hat singing in that vibrating tenor voice ... could you please sing something a little more ... vigorous?  We want to play cards, ride horses and banter and laugh some and you're... well, you're sort of dampening the spirits around here.  Bringing us down.  Puttin' us to sleep, really.  Just trying to help you out, sir, so's that you don't get hurt.  wink.gif

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Roper


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Okay, how about a little tribute to the man in black:

An old cowboy went riding out one dark and windy day
Upon a ridge he rested as he went along his way
When all at once a mighty herd of red eyed cows he saw
A-plowing through the ragged sky and up the cloudy draw

Their brands were still on fire and their hooves were made of steel
Their horns were black and shiny and their hot breath he could feel
A bolt of fear went through him as they thundered through the sky
For he saw the Riders coming hard and he heard their mournful cry

Yippie yi Ohhhhh
Yippie yi yaaaaay
Ghost Riders in the sky

Their faces gaunt, their eyes were blurred, their shirts all soaked with sweat
He's riding hard to catch that herd, but he ain't caught 'em yet
'Cause they've got to ride forever on that range up in the sky
On horses snorting fire
As they ride on hear their cry


As the riders loped on by him he heard one call his name
If you want to save your soul from Hell a-riding on our range
Then cowboy change your ways today or with us you will ride
Trying to catch the Devil's herd, across these endless skies

Yippie yi Ohhhhh
Yippie yi Yaaaaay

Ghost Riders in the sky
Ghost Riders in the sky
Ghost Riders in the sky

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The ability to qualify for, receive, and act on personal revelation is the single most important skill that can be acquired in this life. - Julie Beck
Poncho29


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Alright Johnny Cash! Too bad he's gone and can't come and visit the Saloon. Now HE'S the likes who should be up on stage singin.' smile.gif

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Cocobeem


Keeper of the Holy Grail

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That song ROCKS. My dad and I used to go horseback riding every Saturday when I was 8 to about age 15. I remember him singing that in the car. The lyrics were just spooky enough to be exciting! biggrin.gif

*storytellin' upstairs in the Blue Room if anyone's interested*

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rayb


Hot Air Balloon

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Coco's making me cry.

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PollyAnna


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ray... if you wouldn't whisper with your neighbor (in this case roper..) coco wouldn't yell at you little cowboys... and roper you really SHOULD do better!!! What kind of example would that be for your class???

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hiccups


Future Queen in Zion

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I'm pretty sure the phrase "little cowboys" isn't allowable in the saloon. wink.giflaughing.gif

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"The promptings of the Holy Ghost will always be sufficient for our needs if we keep to the covenant path. Our path is uphill most days, but the help we receive for the climb is literally divine." --Elaine S. Dalton
PollyAnna


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Hubby becomes a little boy when I tell stories, especially at bedtimes... wink.gif (see above to coco's story time post)... I guess I thought all men were like that... never mind..... carry on... giggle.gif

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Cocobeem


Keeper of the Holy Grail

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Gooooood mornin' Ya'll!! biggrin.gif

How 'bout some taters fried up in bacon grease and eggs and biscuits with homemade strawberry jam? (I'll make a special pot o' cocoa for my little buddy ray wink.gif)

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Life is tough but it's tougher if you're stupid.  -John Wayne
rayb


Hot Air Balloon

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I'm thinking of writing a lullaby and singing it here... It's called...

"All the Pretty little Cowboys..."

I think it'd really go over well, followed up with a rousing chorus of "The Light Within" by JKP.

--Ray


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I'm not slow; I'm special.
(Don't take it personally, everyone finds me offensive. Yet somehow I manage to live with myself.)
Cat Herder


Understander of unimportant things

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That New York City feller is at it again... why he even probably wants to serve salsa made in New York City in dainty little bowls ontop of lace doilies!

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It seems to me the only thing you've learned is that Caesar is a "salad dressing dude."
salesortonscom


Wise and Revered Master

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Get a rope!

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God Made Man, Sam Colt Made Him Equal.

Jason
Cocobeem


Keeper of the Holy Grail

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*tosses hot cocoa on ray's silky shirt*

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Poncho29


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Even the piannar player stops playing, stares at Ray and spits into a spitoon.

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Cat Herder


Understander of unimportant things

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but misses and it hits ray's ballet slippers...

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It seems to me the only thing you've learned is that Caesar is a "salad dressing dude."
salesortonscom


Wise and Revered Master

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In nervousness at the hostile change in atmosphere, Ray begins singing his favorite song, "I Feel Pretty". The sound of Colt and Remingtons being cocked causes him to quickly rethink the song selection.

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God Made Man, Sam Colt Made Him Equal.

Jason
Cat Herder


Understander of unimportant things

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The stage manager sighs a grateful sigh of relief that Ray did not default into his version of "Let Me Entertain You"... having been around the last time that happened, he remembers it was not a pretty site... doh.gif

The owner though gets a worried look on his face as he recognizes the tell-tale sound of mounds of peanut shells crunching under foot... a stampede for the doors is in progress as paying customers are trying to get out of the Saloon before their eardrums rupture. bleh.gif

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It seems to me the only thing you've learned is that Caesar is a "salad dressing dude."
rayb


Hot Air Balloon

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Ray sings...

I feel pretty
Oh so pretty
I feel pretty and witty and gay
And I pity
Any girl who isn't me today
I feel charming
Oh so charming
It's alarming how charming I feel
And so pretty
That I hardly can believe I'm real
See the pretty girl in that mirror there?
Who can that attractive girl be?
Such a pretty face
Such a pretty dress
Such a pretty smile
Such a pretty me!
I feel stunning
And entrancing
Feel like running
And dancing for joy
For I'm loved
By a pretty wonderful boy


Then you Roper sings...


Have you met my good friend RayB?
The craziest girl on the block?
You'll know her the minute you see her
She's the one who is in an advanced state of shock
She thinks she's in love
She thinks she's in Spain
She isn't in love
She's merely insane
It must be the heat
Or some rare disease
Or too much to eat
Or maybe it's fleas
Keep away from her
Send for Coco
This is not the RayB we know
Modest and pure
Polite and refined
Well-bred and mature
And out of her mind!
Miss America, Miss America, speech!
Miss America, bravo, speech!


RayB sings...



I feel pretty
Oh so pretty
That the city should give me its key
A committee
Should be organized to honour me
I feel dizzy
I feel sunny
I feel fizzy and funny and fine
And so pretty
Miss America can just resign
See the pretty girl in that mirror there
(Roper: "What mirror, where?")
Who can that attractive girl be?
(Roper: "Which, what, where, whom?")
Such a pretty face
Such a pretty dress
Such a pretty smile
Such a pretty me!


Roper and RayB sing together dancing around the stage...


I feel stunning
And entrancing
Feel like running and dancing for joy
For I'm loved
By a pretty wonderful boy




__________________
I'm not slow; I'm special.
(Don't take it personally, everyone finds me offensive. Yet somehow I manage to live with myself.)
hiccups


Future Queen in Zion

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Just wow.

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"The promptings of the Holy Ghost will always be sufficient for our needs if we keep to the covenant path. Our path is uphill most days, but the help we receive for the climb is literally divine." --Elaine S. Dalton
zealia


Profuse Pontificator

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This place may be too wild for me. Or it may be just my thing!

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Cocobeem


Keeper of the Holy Grail

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Well ain't that jess fine. My horse just ran off, kickin' and fartin'... how'my supposed to git home now, HUH?

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Life is tough but it's tougher if you're stupid.  -John Wayne
PollyAnna


Senior Bucketkeeper

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Jase'll help ya' with'at Coco... I heard he "rents" harses... He's prolly behind this whole durn thang!!!

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Poncho29


Senior Bucketkeeper

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Rayb and Roper are the official saloon dancing girls now. Swing those skirts ladies! laughing.gif

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