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Post Info TOPIC: I claim the right to all bottled water franchises on Mars!


Understander of unimportant things

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I claim the right to all bottled water franchises on Mars!


I think I will call my enterprise... Martian Crater Springs.  The tagline will be "When only the extraterrestial can quench that thirst!" 


http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,234830,00.html


Looking briefly at the photos myself (I have a geology minor), the colored picture could be the result of liquid water or landslide, but the black and white one is very, very similar to water created gulleys on earth (particularly since there are alluvial fans at the base of each gulley, much like the delta of a river).



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Senior Bucketkeeper

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But since it will be astronomically expensive to ship it back, you'll have to dehydrate it first!

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Understander of unimportant things

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Oh, good call there!  I'll have to make you VP over Operations then! 

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Wise and Revered Master

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Cat Herder wrote:



Oh, good call there!  I'll have to make you VP over Operations then! 



Cat, under your contract with Tomacolatte Industries, Inc. the dehydrated bottled water from Mars is actually the property of Tomacolatte Industries Inc.  You also signed the non-compete agreement also so now you cannot start a competing dehydrated bottled water company.  The best we can do for Roper is bring him on as a consultant to the project.  Sorry Roper! 



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Jason



Understander of unimportant things

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Oh great... yer corporate legal counsel too?  I thought you were just CEO and co-founder... I didn't see that in the last org chart... my bad.


So, what you're saying is that Tomacolatte Industries Inc. is interested in buying the rights to my patent-pending, semi-trademarked concept developed on my own time while moonlighting?  I can see the R&D division being synergized by the quest to figure out how to dehydrate and bottle the water efficiently and economically.  That could be a technology boon for Tomacollate Industries as we look for new ways to distribute Tomacollate brand tomacolate.


I suggest we do make Roper VP of Operations over the Martian Springs division though... much cheaper in the long run than hiring him as a consultick... 



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Senior Bucketkeeper

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Does that mean I get to move to Mars?

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The ability to qualify for, receive, and act on personal revelation is the single most important skill that can be acquired in this life. - Julie Beck



Head Chef

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And you're in luck, you'll be reimbursed for mileage! Unfortunately, it's only at the IRS determined rate.

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Senior Bucketkeeper

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Well, at it's closest, Mars is about 35 million miles and at its farthest, about 250 million miles.


So what are the IRS rates--like $.37/mile?  Even at its closest, that would still be like $13 million.  I could buy a nice spread of land and set up a cattle ranch on Mars with that kind of money. Of course, I'd have to purchase those air tanks for cattle--"Bovine Breathers" or whatever they're called.



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Hot Air Balloon

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I only drink Roper brand Mars dehydrated water products... It's how I keep my skin this lovely shade of green.  


--Ray



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Understander of unimportant things

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Wow!  Our first endorsement!


{thinking to self} I'll be a multi-gazillionaire in no time with the per bottle royalty percentage on sales I still get, even after the cost allocations for R&D, management, sales, and overhead, and the cut to the home office at Tomacolatte Industries Inc.  {/thinking to self}


Actually, arbilad, roper can only be reimbursed for travel using his own vehicle.  If we provide him a company owned vehicle, there is no reimburseable travel, particularly if we designate Mars as his assigned work place, regardless of the distance of the commute.  He can, of course, choose to relocate.  But much of it would be at his expense as the firm is not offering a comprehensive relocation package or company paid move.  We may be able to off-shore the position, pending discovery of intelligent life on Mars... 



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It seems to me the only thing you've learned is that Caesar is a "salad dressing dude."


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Of course, I'd have to purchase those air tanks for cattle--"Bovine Breathers" or whatever they're called.


You will also want a Titus Todd Bovine Methane Collector as well.  It will allow you to gather useful methane from cow flatulence for your energy needs.



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