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Post Info TOPIC: Chuck Norris-isms


Understander of unimportant things

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Chuck Norris-isms


As he was beginning to be referenced in one of the political threads, I was reminded of some of the sayings I've seen about Mr. Norris...

Like...

Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFKs head exploded out of sheer amazement.

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.

When you open a can of whoop-ass, Chuck Norris jumps out.

biggrin

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Keeper of the Holy Grail

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When the boogeyman goes to sleep at night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris is so fast he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.



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Life is tough but it's tougher if you're stupid.  -John Wayne



Understander of unimportant things

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Superman knows of a couple other things that will delibate him besides kryptonite... Chuck Norris' left leg and Chuck Norris' right leg.

Some kids wear Superman pajamas.  Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

-- Edited by Cat Herder at 09:01, 2007-10-23

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It seems to me the only thing you've learned is that Caesar is a "salad dressing dude."


Profuse Pontificator

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Chuck Norris Facts

-- Edited by LoudmouthMormon at 15:09, 2007-10-22

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And I'd discuss the holy books with the learned men, seven hours every day.
That would be the sweetest thing of all.

Ohhh....
If I were a rich man...


Senior Bucketkeeper

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Chuck Norris has a following??????????????????????? weirdface.gif

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Keeper of the Holy Grail

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I know, hard to believe with that...that face. Maybe he could hook up with Sheri Dew.

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Life is tough but it's tougher if you're stupid.  -John Wayne



Understander of unimportant things

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Who says his foot hasn't already?

Rumor has it, Chuck got irritated when he found out Sherri Dew hadn't created a Time Out for Chuck in her brand marketing scheme at DB...

rofl.gif

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It seems to me the only thing you've learned is that Caesar is a "salad dressing dude."


Hot Air Balloon

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When Chuck Norris knits a stocking, it comes with the stink already on it.

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Veteran Member

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Chuck Norris doesn't need pornography conference talks, he just uses a round house kick on porn and they put back on clothes!

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"You should listen to your heart, and not the voices in your head." --Marge Simpson


Keeper of the Holy Grail

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...with the stink already on it... rofl.gif

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Life is tough but it's tougher if you're stupid.  -John Wayne

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