How does one do this, I am not sure?

Valhalla · Profuse Pontificator

How does one do this, I am not sure?

salesortonscom · Wise and Revered Master

I think the burden of sin, regret, and guilt are the heaviest burdens. When those weights are lifted off your back then the other challenges of life don't seem so trying. I often wonder how folks who fornicate, do drugs, have illigit kids, messed up personal lives, etc handle it. I don't need or want those kind of extra burdens yet people carry them around all the time in addition to the challeges that you probably face Val. There is the peace of knowing that the Lord has a plan for you, that he knows you personally, and cares about you as an individual. That knowlege also helps make our burdens a little lighter.

Cat Herder · Understander of unimportant things

That is an interesting conundrum you bring up, Val... I'll need to think on it a bit before I give much of a response beyond below.

I have learned, though, that He gives us rest, but does not remove all our burdens, except as Jason indicated. Rather than removing all resistance to us, He tells us to take on His yoke. A yoke, as we know, indicates there is still labor involved. But, a yoke also requires a partner draft animal. And since it is His yoke, He is the other draft animal.

I'm not sure I agree that there is a diminishing return in being rewarded with good for the good one does the closer one gets to Him. I think more or less the burden(s) we feel and become aware of are just more acute and perhaps a little harder to let go of.

Washing the mud doesn't won't hurt nearly as much as chipping the matrix stone away from the rough diamond.

Maybe all you need to do in the acute moments of pain is pray and ask for the strength to endure it just one more day and maybe to help you feel the presence of the "angels round about you, to bear you up" (D&C 88:88). And then the next day, the same thing again. And so on and so on until you've made it through.

rayb · Hot Air Balloon

It is not necessary to run further than you have strength. Sometimes God gives me glimpses of my future self and eternity and perfection and I think sometimes I think "That's me!" and try to live as though it is... when it's only a vision of how things could be... after lots and lots of trials and junk... It's hard not to get discouraged in dark times when we've experienced so many great spiritual highs just minutes prior.

I think this is the way of things, however. There's a word associated with virtue and scripture, it's called "Steadfast"... this is an attribute of God that I'm still struggling to make a part of my life.

All I can confess is that I am certain that Christ does take our burdens--that often he is carrying more than we know, and even when it feels heavy and crushing for us, the mountainous burden Christ bears for us is significantly more... It's then that I return to the basics... to Faith in Christ... I don't think I'll ever outgrow that principle. :)

--Ray

Valhalla · Profuse Pontificator

Actually, the burdens have been getting heavier and heavier. This has nothing to do with sin or guilt. There is some regret on a past choice made in which I know there was no good or bad, I just had to choose, the outcome I did not know, I made the best choice with what info and understanding I had at the time.

That is only a part of it, though, it's just that the closer I come, the heavier it all gets. I don't feel angels around lifting me up, I feel like I am crawling with the weight. I do admit at times that things don't seem to bother me as much for a while. Also hitting middle age and looking back, well, I begin to wonder about me and what I have left behind and sacrificed for others, what I have failed to achieve, or just reaching mediocrity in my endeavors despite my best efforts and then couple that with the burdens and I don't know if I would even call it regret, maybe just wondering what might have been. Add on work to it and burn out, and everything else, it just feels like running on empty straight into a brick wall with a ton of weight on my back.

Faith I have, and even then there is more and more knowledge. One of the things carrying my forward is that I know it is all true, I could not and cannot turn from it. Maybe it is a test for me to see how much I can take, an Abrahamic type test. I just wonder how to toss the burden and make the yoke lighter, it has not felt light in a very long time.

Cat Herder · Understander of unimportant things

Just some rhetorical questions...

Do you suffer from depression in addition to the burdens? I know that can exacerbate things. Are you a perfectionist (mentally / psychologically)? Combine that with depression and it will really do a number on ya...

When was the last time you were happy? Do your burdens prevent you from being happy, or do you feel you can still be happy despite them? Would others consider you to be happy person or someone they would like to be around? Remember that The Lord commanded us to be of good cheer, and He did not put a condition on it of only when things are going great...

Are you looking for the wrong thing in an "easy yoke", like in my plate is worse off than someone else's and I would gladly trade it with what I perceive to be someone else's plate?

Is it a test? Sure, anything that forces one to face a fight or flight syndrome is going to involved character building.

Val, while I don't know exactly what you are going through, I can empathize with the sentiment expressed between the lines. I wish there was a simple easy fix for us men when we experience what you describe in the second paragraph. I don't think there is, and further, I don't think many of us know where to get help or have sufficient others whom we feel comfortable sharing with so that our needs are met in the fashion spoken of in Mosiah 18:8-9. It requires a lot of trust, and more than a feeling of comfortable acquaintanceship. And that is a commodity too often lacking in our culture (both LDS and society).

But, there is hope, and from hope can come great desire, and from desire great active faith, and from that active faith, burdens that appear as mountains can be whittled down to a more manageable molehill. I don't know, if you can do it and can afford it, take a day or two off from work and just do something you like to recharge.

Cat Herder · Understander of unimportant things

Val,

I think this article is pertinent. Don't know if you saw it or not.

Cat

Valhalla · Profuse Pontificator

I am taking vacation for 10 days, I am hoping that will help.

One quality I have is I tend to be quite tenacious and hang on like a pit bull to something when I want it. So, like all else I will get through it, scarred and battered but get through in all the same.

To me it almost seems like a mechanical issue, how to move the burden to Christ, go from A to B. That sort of perplexes me.

salesortonscom · Wise and Revered Master

Vacation is good. It can help put things back into perspective.

rayb · Hot Air Balloon

Val: Doesn't simply deepening one's understanding of Christ and his love for you do that? (That's how I always figured it worked, I suppose it is also a blessing. If you read in Mosiah about Alma in the Land of Helam, his people were in great bondage and God comes ot Alma and explains how He will make their burdens light in a physical sense, and I wonder how they felt til that point... I know they did a lot of sincere praying... )

--Ray

-- Edited by rayb at 17:01, 2007-06-18

fear of shiz · Profuse Pontificator

I think one of the keys is our attitude. The burden is going to feel heavier if we are still straining against it. But when we quit wanting our life to be different--when we accept what is and submit to God's will and to reality, then the burdens become much lighter. It is like trying to sail against the wind--you are just going to get frustrated and worn out. Instead, you have to let the wind be in charge. Then you can really get somewhere.

Valhalla · Profuse Pontificator

I am taking vacation for 10 days, I am hoping that will help.

One quality I have is I tend to be quite tenacious and hang on like a pit bull to something when I want it. So, like all else I will get through it, scarred and battered but get through in all the same.

To me it almost seems like a mechanical issue, how to move the burden to Christ, go from A to B. That sort of perplexes me.

Cocobeem · Keeper of the Holy Grail

Simplification helps me sometimes. Back to basics.

An experience I had while pondering the idea of burdens not being of your own making...

I was going through a particularly trying time during my divorce. I was praying/pondering and said something like, "You know, it really is something... paying for someone else's sins." I heard, "Isn't it." That stopped me dead in my train of thought. There's nothing He does not understand.

Oh, and Howard W. Hunter prefaced your first quoted scripture with "To the truly converted" His yoke is easy, etc... That was in a Conf. issue, but I can't remember which one, and you can probably search it on lds.org if you're really that interested.

Cat Herder · Understander of unimportant things

Interesting... "To the truly converted"...

Hmmm... you haven't been feeling pangs along the lines of "Val, lovest thou me more than these?" "Yea Lord." "Feed my sheep..." lately have you? Sometimes, our own perspective on things and understanding of how to cast our burdens on the Savior only get clearer as we willingly, cheerfully, and unbegrudgelingly serve others. Not pointing any fingers, cuz you are definitely dilligent in your callings and duties. Just a thought that maybe something may be in the way of losing yourself (like it is for most all of us).

Cocobeem · Keeper of the Holy Grail

Just a shot in the dark-- Are you feeling like you married the wrong woman?

glumirk · Senior Member

I've wondered about how to be "truly converted", and how to know that you are really praying with "true intent". Joseph Smith sure prayed with true intent and he didn't even have the fullness of the gospel. All he had was a deep desire that overwhelmed him from within, causing him to take a leap of faith that he'd never thought of before. Because of that prayer, his life became much more complicated, wouldn't you say? I think that being mobbed, tarred and feathered, hated by most of the community, losing children, watching his close friends fall away from the church. I'm sure he felt they were getting heavier and heavier, but he could never deny the reality of his vision, and the truth that he was taught. D&C 121 has always been a comforting scripture to me. I want to say 122 is good as well, but I don't have my scriptures nearby to see the exact verses. I know where they are on the page though!

One thing that we have to remember is that life was never meant to be easy. What we do know is that Heavenly Father loves us, and so He sent His Son, Jesus Christ to Atone not only for the sins of the world, but for the pains, and the sorrows, and everything that we have ever felt, but infinitely worse. Sometimes just thinking about that gives me a little extra strength to hold out just a little longer realizing that the Lord knows how I feel, and has felt it so much more than I could ever imagine.

You can't always help a car accident, a flood, losing your job even though you've been working hard for a long time. You can't always help it when your children make poor choices even though you have strived for their entire lives to teach them correct principles. You can't change anyone's decisions but your own.

One thing I have learned is that you can choose to be happy through it all. When I am at my lowest (which is in sheer panic/depression/no self worth/discouraged), the best thing to do is say a prayer of gratitude. Or even have one say one for me if I feel I can't. Sometimes when you look at all you really have, and all the opportunities that lie ahead of you, suddenly the trials don't seem as bad. I know that when I turn to Him with gratitude, more than just complaining and worrying about my problems, that I am filled with hope. The Atonement gives me so much hope that for a short while I can forget all about my problems and just rejoice. And once hope has been restored, my problems aren't so bad after all. I know that is how the Atonement has worked in my life. Sometimes we just have to learn how to see it. He is always reaching out to us, and asking us to come unto Him, if we just allow Him, and look for how He has already helped us. That change in perspective because of the Atonement is something that few people have.

Also, read this: Broken Things To Mend by Jeffrey R. Holland. It always helps me to remember when I am feeling down.

bokbadok · Senior Bucketkeeper

So Val, what are you doing for your vacation?

Valhalla · Profuse Pontificator

Heading to CA, hopefully for some nice quiet time, shooting, jet skiing, etc.

Cocobeem · Keeper of the Holy Grail

Quiet time shooting?

hmm...

bokbadok · Senior Bucketkeeper

is your family going with you?

salesortonscom · Wise and Revered Master

What part of California Val?

Valhalla · Profuse Pontificator

Shooting is very relaxing for me. Amazing how much stress knocking down steel plates in rapid succession with a .45 can do for you.

Yep, whole family is going. We're in the north county San Diego area.

Interesting enough in response to my own original question, I found that my wanting to be okay was enough, the Lord addressed the rest. He simply blocked things from my mind. As odd as that may sound, I have no other explanation. I was being eaten up by it and I think He just said enough for you right now, you can't take more than that for the time being. It has been removed, though residually it is still there, it is not the issue it was.

-- Edited by Valhalla at 07:26, 2007-06-21

-- Edited by Valhalla at 07:32, 2007-06-21

Cat Herder · Understander of unimportant things

That works too.

Sometimes, all we have to do is ask for a respite. Hope you have a good vacation!

PollyAnna · Senior Bucketkeeper

Valhalla wrote:
As odd as that may sound, I have no other explanation. I was being eaten up by it and I think He just said enough for you right now, you can't take more than that for the time being. It has been removed, though residually it is still there, it is not the issue it was.

I KNOW how this feels... I have an issue in my own life that the Lord did this with. It no longer troubles me... I honestly do not feel at all anxious about it. The issue IS still there in the background... In fact it will always be there as long as I live, but it has very little power over me. My salvation was a gift I will forever thank the Lord for...

Val, I hope that you get long -term or permanent relief as well...

Valhalla · Profuse Pontificator

The interesting thing actually will be what that long-term or permanent relief will be, and most likely not until after this life.

At this time, I am feeling better right now, better than I have in a long time, and frankly, I have no reason to feel better. It's funny how often you don't realize your prayers for relief have been granted until later you think "hey, I haven't been feeling as bad lately, thank you Father."