Jesus dies but then lives again. Bruce Willis was a ghost all along. Norman had his dead mother in his basement. Private Ryan lives. Dorothy makes it back to Kansas. ET makes it home. Marty makes it back to 1985. Clarence gets his wings. James Bond gets the girl. Ray Kinsella plays catch with his dad. Indiana Jones finds the Ark. And the Holy Grail. The Von Trapp family escapes to Switzerland. Andy escapes Shawshank. The Planet of the Apes is just Earth many years later. Seabiscuit wins. Charlie wins the chocolate factory. Rocky loses. Then he wins. Then Apollo dies and Rocky goes to Russia and wins again. Rudy gets to play. Frodo destroys the ring. They find Nemo. They shoot Old Yeller. Princess Fiona becomes an ogre. The Beast becomes a human. Darth Vader is Luke's father. Neo is the one. Soylent Green is people! Rhett leaves Scarlett. Rosebud was a sled. Ilsa gets on the plane with Lazlo. Rick stays in Casablanca.
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I'm not voting for Ron Paul because it's not expressly prescribed in the Constitution.
Logan and Jessica use an Ankh Pendant to find out that you can live in the outside world.
Mad Max ends up killing all the freaky, post apocolyptic, punks.
Amazon Women On the Moon has little to do with Amazon Women on the Moon.
Poor Prostitute actually does get to stay with rich playboy and lives happily ever after.
Hot hotel maid gets the rich guy.
Hot wedding planner ends up with the rich guy.
Irish Immigrants rush to find land in Oklahoma and fall in love.
80's wedding singer ends up with girl from ET with the help of Billy Idol.
The blond does get the law degree and wins the big case.
Dread Pirate Roberts is actually Buttercup's true love, isn't completely dead, and ends up saving her and living happily ever after.
Bill Murray character eventually learns not to be a jerk and makes it through ground hog day.
Kids outsmart evil bad guy adults.
Highschool kids fight Russian occupiers and end up dead.
Ferris gets away with playing hookey while Principal Rooney has the worst day ever.
Patrick Swayze and girl with the big nose from Ferris Bueller movie dance dirty.
Kevin Bacon finds a way to have the teens dance in overly repressive religous town.
Small ethnic kid who gets picked on in school learns karate, wins the big tournament against cheating, rich white kids and he gets the hot rich, white girl too.
Jeff Goldblum turns into horrible creature and tries to kill the hot brunette.
Inept Italian attourney gets cousin and best friend off of murder charges in deep south.
Borderline retarded kid living in Idaho helps illegal immigrant friend win class president at white bread highschool.
Mormon sheriff in small town figures out that his only deputy is a murderer.
but the bees were no longer humming (they're all dying off)... nor sweet birds singing
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no unhallowed hand can stop the work from progressing... the truth of God will go forth till it has penetrated every website, sounded in every ear, till the purposes of God shall be accomplished and the great Jehovah shall say the work is done
The people were shown the way after following the prophet
A small arachnid survived a sudden rain storm
A sculpture of ice flakes had no stomach for heat
Rowing a boat allows one to ponder mortal life
All the bottles next to the wall will be emptied
Regardless of how sung, the menu will always contain fried ham
A farmer takes stock of his assets and life by using a Dell
Eyes must be associated with a face to prevent shame
Being fat has it's perks, like...
van Gogh's painting inspires a song
There will be dancing and fun at a shack off the highway in Georgia
Billy Joel gives a highly summarized history lesson
Bill Pullman becomes president and Cousin Eddie helps save the human race.
A miser has an epiphany and learns charity.
Mel Gibson paints his face blue and wields a big sword, fighting the British.
Mel Gibson throws a tomahawk and ends up fighting the British again.
The psychiatrist helping the boy who sees dead people is really dead.
Mom and Dad severely underpay the babysitter for the work she has to do.
Honeycutt says goodbye to Hawkeye.
The crew of the Memphis Belle all survive their last mission.
Kirk Douglas inspires civil war in ancient Rome.
Lindsay Lohan and Jamie Lee Curtis rehash the same switcheroo storyline yet another time.
Popeye beats up Bluto and saves Olive.
Grandfather who was left for dead turns out to have only been mostly dead but wakes up in time to save family who left him from a hostile, lifelong foe.
Here's a clue, the butler really did do it... unless it happened this way.
The lunatic former chief inspector fails at killing Clouseau.
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It seems to me the only thing you've learned is that Caesar is a "salad dressing dude."
